I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
smell my finger.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
