I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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