Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
