Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Randomize
