He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Randomize
