Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
You've changed since you got that strap on
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
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