haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize