OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
Randomize
