my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Randomize
