If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Randomize
