I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
Randomize
