Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
