I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
wow bdsm is so cute
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