Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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