I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
