Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
