Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
