? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Randomize
