For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
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