remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
