I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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