TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
