We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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