That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
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