She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize