Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize