I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
