just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Randomize
