This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Randomize