Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
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