There is no way he is gay with that hair.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
