Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
he was CRYING into my vagina
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
