I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
Randomize