Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Randomize