he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize