Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
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