Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
