Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Randomize
