i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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