I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Randomize
