I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
