We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
