woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
