The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
my mouth tastes like poor choices
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I don't deserve a penis
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Randomize
