HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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