Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
I'm really busy with my period
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