Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
