was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
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