Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
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