wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Randomize
