That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Randomize
