He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
